A couple of months ago I wrote why I love living a military life, and it’s true. I’ve said it many times in this blog so far BUT there are things that make it hard….. really, really hard. Most will say that with all endeavors we love, there are the dark sides. Sides that make us pause and question our decisions in life. Right now I’m having one of those moments where the dark side of military life is speaking loud and clear and I am questioning why I like it. Here are the reasons, the dark ones, to not live this life.
1. The constant good-byes. Well, they aren’t true “good-byes”, more like “see ya, laters” but it is the moment where you must turn your back and continue on with life without someone you love. The most difficult are our spouses, parents and our military families we treat like family. Those moments never get easier…. NEVER!
2. Having to take our children from a life they love. Military children form fast friendships and partake in sports they love and go to schools with teachers that inspire them. It is a sad moment when you have to tell your children that you will be moving them from those people or that those people are moving away from them. There is nothing you can do to comfort them as they take a leap of faith and hope that they will make another friend, have a teacher they love or a join a winning sports team.
3. Looking for new doctors and dentists. For the first time in my Navy life I’m being seen at a civilian dental practice and I LOVE THEM! They have been great with our boys and just all around great people work in this practice. So, looking forward to our upcoming PCS next year I’m feeling pains of having to leave a practice I’m thrilled with and hope to find a new one that meets the standard I expect.
4. Making new friends. For some people this isn’t a big deal. They are outgoing and likable but me… not so much. I tend to be reserved and hold back on warming up to new people. It seems that after I finally find one or two people that will have my back, they become my sisters, then they leave or I leave. It is sad and hard and I’m dreading having to leave friends here and make new ones.
5. The packing and unpacking. It is true that I enjoy cleaning out our home and getting ready for our move but it is a lot of work and each time I pray the Navy gives me the time to do it. I also stress about where our kids will be. Will they be in school or with a sitter or home with us? Which one is better? Then there is the moment you take a look at your new home and wonder if all your stuff will fit. And of course, there are the boxes and paper….. Some people like when the packers take all the stuff away but after having to organize a house with piles of stuff everywhere because the packers just put stuff anywhere, I’ll take this one on no matter how much I don’t like it.
So, there we have it. Five reasons that make me question why I continue to follow the man I love and live this life. They are small sacrifices that I don’t mind dealing with but when I have to face them I can’t help but resent my military life. But, then I remind myself of all the great things especially the most important, my husband. It might be a military life I live but it wouldn’t be much of a life at all without him. So, when I am feeling resentful and angry because I have to say “good-bye” to my family, I will pour a glass of wine, sit on my porch and chat with a friend and hope to feel better the next day.